Diet Time

I am getting more crap for being on a diet than for being fat.

Why is our culture so messed up?!

I want to start eating healthier so I feel better, look better, and have more energy. And people are telling me I don't need to do that. They're saying "Oh shut up, you're beautiful the way you are, don't listen to society!!!" Well yeah, it's not all about that. I think I look fine. I just don't fit in clothes that well and I want to be healthy. 

Now a days people give you more of a hard time for trying to be skinny and "conforming" than they do for being fat or eating three meals at once. 

I don't eat enough vegetables. I eat lots of fruit so that's good. I eat quite a bit of meat. I eat way too much grains and pasta-y stuff. I started this soup diet where you basically only eat vegetable soup, vegetables, and fruit. As the week goes on you can begin having a small amount of poultry or yogurt. The soup was pretty gross. My friends told me I was crazy for doing that and that I didn't need to. Well I just wanted to. I wanted to get a start on trying to eat less. It's not even so much that I eat unhealthy things, it's just that I eat a lot. 

I want to be in the healthy range for my height. Being short means I have to weigh a lot less than most people to have the "healthy" BMI. Really, it isn't about the number on my pants, it's the number on the scale. It's gone up. A lot. My size hasn't changed a ton, my pants are bigger because that's where I tend to gain my weight: thighs and butt. It's a lot healthier to be bottom heavy than top heavy so that's good I guess. I don't think I look that bad. Seeing myself from the top you'd think I was an average weight girl. Just seeing me from the bottom you'd think I was a fat girl. That doesn't bother me too much. I'd just like to be a little slimmer so I look better in a swim suit and I don't have to wear Spanx with all my tight dresses. I hate running but I know that's the best way to lose lower body weight. Well. The truth is, I don't want to lose my butt. I like it. People say it's one of the best things about my body. So I obviously don't want to lose it. Just a little on my thighs. That's one reason I hadn't started trying to lose weight and I haven't exercised in a long time. Now though, it's to the point where if I lost a little bit I think that'd be good. I just don't want to be another flat bottomed white girl ya know? But I want to fit into my shorts from past summers so... it's time to lose a little I suppose. 

 #thestruggle :(